You are enough, you always were enough, and you always will be enough
By Rachel Burchfield
Sorority recruitment is exciting. It is miserable. It is hot. It is invigorating. It is empowering. It is aching feet. It is oversharing. It is answering the same question 25 different ways. It is my cheeks hurt too much from smiling. It is wonderful. It is awful. It is an emotional roller coaster. It is over-perfumed. It is a fashion show. It is meaningful. It is a beginning. It is an ending. It is complex. It is confusing. It is a lot.
But let me tell you one thing sorority recruitment most certainly is not: A definer of your worth.
Sweet girl, listen. And listen closely. Some of you are going to have the sorority recruitment you’ve dreamed about since you were five. Some of you are not. (Heck, some of you just decided 10 minutes ago to participate. You weren’t thinking about this even a month ago.) Regardless. Regardless! You are enough. Just as you are.
Your sorority letters – or, in some cases, lack thereof – do not define you. Only you can define you. Your sorority letters do not provide your worth, your inherent value, your meaning, your purpose. Sorority life is everything you think it is and more, but if you’re coming to sorority recruitment to get validated, you’ve come to the wrong place. You must find that self-worth within yourself. No letters – even if they are “the best” letters – will ever be able to give you true inner confidence, value, and worth. You alone are the keeper of those keys.
You are already a complete person right now, unaffiliated with any sorority. You don’t need a sorority to complete you. You are complete. You are beautiful, intelligent, compassionate, hilarious, irreverent, talented, athletic (well, unless you’re me – then you’re definitely not that), witty, and everything good in this world today, and the opening of an envelope on Bid Day will not raise or lower your stock in life. Your value does not increase or decrease based on a Bid Day jersey.
So many times we as women think “oh, well if only I can a.) date the right man, b.) pledge the right sorority, c.) fit into the right dress size, d.) get the right job, then I will be enough.” NOPE. You already are enough right this very moment, just as you are. You do not need all of the above add-ons. They are the sprinkles on top of an already delicious, fabulous, incredible cake.
As you enter sorority recruitment, be yourself. Your imperfect, raw, real, irreverent, true self. Let the right women fall in love with the real you. Just like when you go on dates, you should always be yourself (there are so many parallels between sorority recruitment and dating that I could write a book on it) – what’s the point if the man you’re dating falls in love with someone that isn’t really you? How far is that relationship really going to go? Same with sorority recruitment. If you’re not who you really are, how will you find your tribe? Show them the unashamed you that so many people already love and adore.
You are enough. You are worthy. And sorority life – let me tell you, it’s wonderful. I wouldn’t change one thing about my decision to join my chapter and become a Panhellenic woman. But that said, if all I had to hang my worthiness on were my letters, I’d be in a mess of trouble. I – and you – have so much more than Greek letters to define us.
I hope you have the most magical sorority recruitment. I wish you happiness and peace about your decisions and calm and unfettered joy and everything good. But the truth is, I don’t know one person who has ever had a sorority recruitment turn out 100 percent the way they thought it would. Not one.
But the good news is – it always turns out how it is supposed to, and it always turns out better than you thought it could be.
Walk in there a confident, complete woman, be yourself, wear your letters with pride, but realize that with or without letters, you’re everything and more, and raise your head and walk like the queen that you most certainly are into each sorority recruitment event and into each and every room you enter from now until the end of time.
You are enough, you always were enough, and you always will be enough.
Enjoy this moment. (Even the aching feet.) And in that moment of sorority recruitment when you feel like quitting – let’s be honest, we all have that moment – remember what I said, adjust your invisible crown, and continue to shine.